Ok. So, I guess I need to clarify what I was trying to say in last weeks post just a little bit. I was little all over the place in the way I was laying things out so it's no wonder some of what I said was less than understandable.
When I hear the word entitlement, I instantly think of a spoiled rotten child who thinks he deserves the world on a silver platter. In my mind, not even and king deserves that. My point in last weeks post is that if you want something, work for it. My generation is one of the least likely to work for something. We'd much rather sit back and wait for it to come to us.
The point was made when I posted this on Facebook that in the LDS church, we're taught that children are entitled to a married mother and father who honor those promises they made at marriage. I will tread delicately here as I think this is a bit of a difficult subject to discuss. No one who has not been in a situation that might require raising a child on their own can say that they know exactly how they would handle the situation were they not able to remain with their spouse/significant other. That's not saying that a child isn't entitled to a mom and a dad. I have my own opinions on that, but they will have to wait for another post. The point in this is that we are not the judges. Sometimes there are extenuating circumstances that cannot be helped and a mother or a father who finds themselves in those situations need only answer to his/her own conscience and make peace with whatever God they believe in.
Now, in my original posting, I was pointing out two principles really: Work and gratitude, both of which seem to be slowly disappearing in todays youth. As one of todays youth, I can call on my own experiences here as I'm just as guilty as many of my fellow young adults and teenagers.
I think that if we were to live in any other time than now, we would not survive. All through history, we have examples of how empires were built, wars were fought, and freedoms were won. None of them has been a result of a get-rich-quick scheme. All life was based around work. The fields were sewn and cared for, cities were built, roads were paved, and lives were created by applying a little elbow grease. Once, most of this world was unexplored and new. There was a lot of work to be done. Maybe part of the reason we don't work as hard is because there aren't many new frontiers. There is no Dances with Wolves esque lifestyle for us to experience where we meet strange people we've never really seen before. We have reached a limit...unless we launch into a Star Trek lifestyle which I don't see happening anytime soon. I will admit that that may well be part of why we don't work as hard in the manual labor fields, but at the same time there is always work to do.
When I think of why the principle of work has changed, a story comes to mind. The story of John Henry. I know most of us are familiar with it, but I'll give a very short, probably not very accurate recap. John Henry was a man who worked on the railroad when it was being laid to cross the nation. He was a giant of a man. He worked harder and longer than any other man alive. He would go around singing and swinging his hammer, driving the spikes in faster and farther than any other man. Eventually, a man with a new invention came around looking for John Henry. He claimed he's steam driven machine could beat any man alive at driving a railroad spike into the ground, thus eliminating the need for the manual labor that John Henry loved doing. John Henry accepted the challenge. For the good of the men he worked with and for himself, John Henry worked hard to beat the steam powered hammer...and he did. The mountain of a man who drove steel harder and faster than any other man alive beat the machine that had been created to best him...only to die in his victory.
I tell that story because growing up, John Henry was a symbol to me of what it meant to work. I was fascinated by his story though no one ever really knew. He worked hard and long because he loved what he did and it had to be done. That fact has not changed and will never change...the work itself has just shifted.
I am a child of the late 80's/early 90's. I remember all the weird fashion and the sometimes waaaay over the top singers and cheesy movies. I remember when technology started changing. I remember our first computer way back in the day...boy was that thing basic. I remember the cell phones then. I don't know that I ever could have imagined them being what they are now. I don't have an appreciation for what life was like 20 years earlier just as children now don't have any idea what I'm talking about. They instead are taught that 4 year olds with cell phones is normal, or an xbox 360 is something every kid is supposed to have. That may not be something a parent comes out and says, but actions will always speak louder than words.
In my last post, I said that parents are responsible for teaching a child how to be a person. What I meant was that children watch us. They mimic everyone. My nephew, for instance, has taken to repeating the word Goonies every time we say it. I'm sure my brother will teach him the whole phrase the Goonies say. See the point though? If he mimics what we say now, at a year and a half, how much else is he watching us say and do? It is my brother and sister-in-laws responsibility to teach him not only through their words, but through their example. If he sees them working hard, he'll learn to work hard too. That is the case with every child. Every child is experiencing the world with a new perspective and they will do what those closest to them do. That is why, statistically, when a parent has trouble in their lives, a child is likely to repeat it. Therefore, a parent who is interested in the well being of their child is responsible for teaching their children to work for everything they have.
As I said in my last posting, my family works when we have big projects to do. We've done things like repainting our house, putting up a new fence, taking down backyard playground equipment, moving homes, weeding gardens, and doing general yard work. I should say that we were better at doing that before we grew up and our parents couldn't take away much of anything to threaten us anymore. When we were younger, anytime there was big project to do, we all helped. Now, the only time you really see us working together is when the cars need to be washed...and my dad did his truck almost completely by himself the other day. My mother mowed the lawn this morning because my brother and I didn't want to get up and take the mower away from her and do it for her.
My parents taught us how to work. They would work with us and show us how to do things. I don't remember them ever telling us we had work to do and then them not coming out and working with us. That's not the norm anymore. Now, we tell ourselves that we won't be as mean and cruel as our parents were and we won't force our own children to suffer the way we did. How, in the name of everything that is good on this earth, is working suffering?? When did it become so wrong to teach a child that working is the best way to get what you need? When did it become such a horrible thing to do manual labor? How have we forgotten the benefits and the rewards that come from accomplishing a seemingly giant job? Why is it so much better to give a child what he wants simply because he's screaming for it, rather than teach him how he can earn it?
I don't know where the disconnect happened. I don't know how we've gone from a people who worked hard for everything they had, to a people who are headed to a fate like the people in Wall-E. I don't know how that happened. I do know how to fix it. Work. Work will cure a great many things. It lifts the heart that has been damaged and helps others with what they need. The end reward, the knowledge that you did everything you could to accomplish what you needed to and the strength to push through one more day, is more than enough for me. Everything else is just icing on the cake.
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